5 Tips to Quiet Naysayers & Access Your Brilliance
When you’re playing big and asking for what you want and need, you’re bound to come across a few naysayers. You know the ones. The ones who tell you:
“Are you really sure you want to do that? What if you/we fail?!”
“But you don’t have the right expertise for that position/initiative/business…”
“That’s already been done before. Why do you think you can make it work?”
If those naysayers are people you respect and trust, it can feel especially defeating and frustrating to have them rain all over your dream parade. You may begin to doubt yourself or get stuck in indecisive-land. (Yes, indecisive-land exists and I’ve been caught there many times.)
You want to feel ALIVE, clear-headed and ready to take on the world when you’re striving to make great things happen!
So how do you move towards your goals and quiet the naysayers? And what if one of those naysayers is you?
5 Tips to Quiet Naysayers & Access Your Brilliance:
1. Consider Your Top 5
Jim Rohn, thought leader and entrepreneur, famously said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Who you surround yourself with matters.
Research proves that our thoughts, actions and behaviors are contagious. If you want to lose weight, research says to spend time with people who are thin. If you want to be better at your finances, surround yourself with people who are great with money. If you want to get ahead in your career and business, choose supportive allies, mentors and coaches who won’t be saying “no,” but can cheer you on, share best practices and hold you accountable.
Are the five people you spend the most time with professionally and personally the type of people you want to emulate? Do you share similar mindsets, values and behaviors? If not, what adjustments can you make?
2. Examine Your Unconscious Biases
Naysayers can question your approach or strategy – which can be helpful. To stay a step ahead, examine your unconscious biases – the blind spots we all can have that inhibit our decision making. We can be clouded by previous experiences – good and bad.
So how do you see around a blind spot? Consider all sides of an argument or approach to your initiative and problem. Also, crowd source credible, trustworthy and constructive feedback and market analysis. Ideally, lean on individuals who want to see you grow and succeed.
3. Question Your Mindset
We can often be our own biggest naysayer and critic through our negative mindset. Isn’t it interesting how our minds can conjure up the worst-case scenarios right before we go for what we want? It’s as if we are talking ourselves out of growth and change. My mind immediately goes to me losing money, clients or friends. What about you? What fearful and negative thoughts flood your mind?
This isn’t all bad. It’s helpful to prepare yourself for hurdles and road blocks. However, if your mind stays in a cycle of negativity and fear, it becomes difficult to push forward with confidence and courage.
I ask my clients to write down all of their perceived fears, challenges and concerns. Once you write these thoughts down, they magically lose their stronghold on you. You’re able to minimize them when looking at them from a place of non-judgement.
4. Tap Into Your Wisdom
Now it’s time to tap into your intuition – your wise inner voice for direction, guidance and answers.
Steve Jobs once said, “Don’t let the noise of others drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
A few ways to tap into that inner voice, include:
Meditate and/or pray
Walk, run or do another form of exercise
Play a game
Practice an art form
Listen to music you love
Notice how your body is reacting to or feeling about certain things
Journal and ask your highest self for guidance
Do you notice a common theme in the list above? All of the options listed (and there are so many more you can try), allow your mind to relax and calm down. When your mind is still and free from worry and stress, you’re inner wisdom appears.
5. Practice Surrender and Trust
As you move in the direction of what you want, it’s important to envision the outcome. This helps you clarify your next steps and relish in the excitement of possibilities. However, I’ve discovered that it’s just as important to let go of how the outcomes and key lessons materialize. Sometimes, reality is way more exciting and beautiful than I could have ever imagined!
Gabrielle Bernstein, famous life coach and author, teaches that the “Universe has your back.” It’s a belief I also share, even when I struggle to trust and stay positive. I often need to tell myself – sometimes over and over and over again – to trust, let go and believe that the right people, resources and sign posts will appear to navigate me. When I finally trust, I begin to see what I wasn’t able to see before.
Your turn: Are you already practicing these five tips to access your brilliance and quiet the naysayers? If not, which tip may be the one idea to help you move closer to your goals? I’d love to know. Post in the comments below this blog.
Cheers to you!
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Let's connect and begin a conversation. My passion is equipping leaders with strategies to accelerate success, develop high performing teams and build cultures where employees are inspired to work their best. - Jennifer Spaulding, Leadership & Executive Coach